Today I offer you a candid look at my journey of starting a new career as an author. I'm not about to offer you 10 steps for balancing a busy life, nor am I going to tell you how "together" I have it. It's just me, walking through life.
Let's get right to the juicy center of it all: Although I've written a number of articles for websites and have a personal story published in someone else's book, it wasn't until the summer of 2014 that I realized how passionate I am about writing. Ironically, at the moment, I'm an Event Coordinator for an accomplished non-fiction author.
Making the decision to embark on a new career path has been a crazy awesome fun! But it's also challenging. I always test 50/50 for being right/left brained, I prefer to live life on the "right" side. The part I'm struggling with, is the fact that my job requires me to be 90% left brained. And I didn't realize until recently, that life on the "left" side causes me to shift my attention away from the Lord. Don't freak out on me! I know He's always with me and I can close my eyes and BAM! there He is. But for whatever reason, having to be so decisive, logical, and strategic, makes it harder for me to slow down and experience Him. No offense to you amazing lefties! But I'm not used to it and I find it exhausting.
I used to start my day with hours of quiet contemplation with Jesus, dancing, and writing, but now I'm too aware of the time- HURRY to start work, RUSH to drive kids around, RUN errands, tap back into CREATIVE side and work on my novel, teach ballet, exercise, dance in the various ministries I'm in, and oh...I'm a wife and have a house to clean , and for some reason people think they have to eat every day which means I need time to cook! I'm in a swirl of activity, busy flopping back and forth between left and right brain.
I crave the peace, passion, creativity, and depth of living not just from my right brain, but from my spirit. And that is where I am at the moment - learning to jump around in my brain, but to live from a much deeper place in the spirit. To remember to slow down and look, listen, and expect Him to show up. I had NO idea that my job would so affect my ability to let go of the noise in my head and embrace the quiet of my spirit. I'm not complaining about my job! I have a GREAT job! But I'm realizing now, more than anything, I'm ready to see my dreams and my passion as an author become my full-time job. Until that happens, I need grace!
Can you relate?