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"Through the tapping of my fingers, I have found my voice."


Ponderings during the pandemic, #1.

Updated: Apr 3, 2020

Two weeks before the pandemic broke out, the Lord gave me a vision. I saw myself on my knees, hands lifted in worship. The longer I stayed there, the smaller I became. I was sinking, further and further down, becoming invisible. As I disappeared, a soft white light rose from me. It grew and grew until I was gone and all that remained was magnificent light.

At first, I thought this was an acknowledgment or confirmation that God saw my surrender and was pleased. Perhaps, He was encouraging me that my flesh was diminishing, but my spirit was growing stronger. Boy, was I wrong!

This wasn’t a pat on the back, but an appeal. It wasn’t meant to point to the glory of my spirit, but to the glory of His. It was an invitation to bow low and yield more. To surrender my agenda and timetable so that He can give me His.

To become nothing, so He can be everything.

To choose the cross. To die to anything that resembles me more than it showcases Him.

Death is the only path to resurrection life. Not resurrection of our life—where we’re viewed with awe and wonder but an unhindered rising of His life in us. And right now, most of us are standing in front of our own private crosses. Normal life has come to a standstill. Areas we’ve been too busy to notice are rising to the surface, begging for attention. Crying out for God’s cleansing.

Obviously, the enemy is behind the pandemic. Our freedom, plans, schedules, businesses, relationships—everything feels like it’s being ripped from our hands. As if we’re not in control of our own lives. But were we ever really in control? And if we thought we were, let’s repent because only God must be. Through this time of isolation, we finally see our frailty as humans. We're reminded of our great need for God. Invited to die to anything and everything that has hindered Him from having full control of our lives.

What if instead of viewing this as a theft, we decide to offer it? The enemy thinks he’s taken the things we hold dear, but he cannot take what we willingly choose to give the Lord. So, let’s bless the Lord with our best gifts. Let's lay everything down to discover the wonder, simplicity, and power of knowing Him. Let’s offer every aspect of our lives that has been affected by what’s happening, and present it to God as a gift. There’s joy in gift-giving! There are anticipation and laughter!

The wicked plots against the just, And gnashes at him with his teeth. The Lord laughs at him, For He sees that his day is coming (Psalm 37:12-13).

So, let’s laugh at the enemy and find our joy in complete surrender! It is our honor to lavish the Lord with our trust and thanksgiving. To release our days, desires, and lives to Him so He can rise within us and truly become our Lord. As we bow in humility, He will be glorified in us and, ultimately, through us.


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